Nervous Trepidation and Excitement

Today is T-1 to tomorrow. It's been an excellent week so far, and it's going to be either a weekend filled with satisfaction or regretful disappointment. I'm not saying what I want to say. An update is needed. I need to work out today. I need to run a lot, do ab exercises, and do squats. I need to finish the milk in my fridge before it goes bad. I need to clean and vacuum. I need to put my clothes into the washing machine. I need to work on myself. I need to repaint my nails. I need to put stuff away. I need to take stuff out, and put things in my bathroom shelf. I need to braid my hair tomorrow. I need to clean my contacts really well. I need to stretch. I need to check the lighting. I need to check.

Grade 6 Faster Stronger Game

For the 6th-graders today, I prepared mini-games to break the monotony of doing pages from the textbook and then an activity disguised as a game. The students played strength and speed games while filling out a worksheet with sentences comparing themselves to their group members.

• I am taller/shorter than________.
• I am older/younger than ________.
• I am faster/slower than________.
• I am stronger/weaker than________.

I stamped their papers after twelve error-free sentences were written.

It was a satisfying way to end Chapter 12: I'm Faster Than You.

Positivity

This week, I felt super motivated when it came to hitting the gym and after school. I hate it when  other people are being super negative and say discouraging things like "Oh, it's not like it'll make any difference in a week", but I love that they're wrong. 

It's easier for me to measure with my eyes, hands, and clothes. I look and feel less bloated, I sleep super well after running 4 km, my skin looks better after sweating, I don't feel guilty eating dinner, and I'm making much better use of my time after school instead of going home to binge-watch Youtube videos, binge-eat, and feel alone and sad.

To be fair, I'm nowhere near my goal weight. By my own standards, I need to lose 5 kg. By K-pop idol standards, I need to lose 12 kg. Maybe after I'm cremated, I'll finally reach that feather-light weight.

Strong dedication this week, and great plans all weekend and next week. The weather here is freezing, but life is gouda.

Dream Future Home

Sitcom homes have always held their appeal for me. Whether it's the quaint and nostalgic charm of Monica Geller's apartment in its plum location in the heart of New York from Friends,

or the bright and modern comfiness of Penny's apartment from The Big Bang Theory (I preferred her smaller space over Sheldon and Leonard's loftier apartment across the hall),

I've always wanted to remodel my future home (or homes) to something with a similar vibe. My all-time favourite television apartment, however, would have to be Frasier Crane's Seattle loft #1901 from Frasier. 

The open living space and dining area, the grand piano, Daphne's bedroom decor, Frasier's master bedroom complete with an ensuite bathroom and sauna, and an obstructed view of the entire city of Seattle - the fictional Elliot Bay Towers are to die for.

It's especially charming when decked in festive Christmas decor by the overzealous Martin Crane.

If I ever have kids in the future, I would go all out for Christmas too. Christmas is a time for warmth, magic, and childlike wonder. I would deck out the entire home with lit-up villages, trains, wreaths, trees, and lights until it looks like a mix between Whoville and a toy store.

 

I miss spending Christmas back home. Next year, I'm going to be all over these festivities.

"With one hand the past moves us forward and with the other it pulls us back" - Lilith Sternin (Frasier)

One year and two months later, I finally told him off. It's my fault I never stood up for myself, and never  insisted on self-respect. I was desperate and stupid, holding onto the fleeting hope that he would come back to me and shower me with affection again. I will always keep hoping for a reconciliation unless there's absolutely nothing for me to go back to - and now there isn't. Closure, good friend, nice to see you, finally.

Riddikulus

I'm being ridiculous. I went to Korean class on Wednesday night, and talked to him. Now I'm grumpy and pissed off at every guy I know, which is absolutely ridiculous. It's as though everything being said by any guy puts me in an even fouler mood these few days.

Ask me nicely. Say please.
You need to learn to read more carefully.
Are you still there.
It was a summer fling.
I'm not into museums.
I'll go if I have nothing else to do.
She's very beautiful.
And this is the second girl.
I would never call you.
What was the point of me going?
Childish.
Nope.
No.
No you don't.

Foul mood, I tell you. Foul. If this weekend turns out shite, I'm regressing into a hermit.

Insta-Confused

2am on Sunday morning found me at home talking to Judy on the phone, and fiddling around on my phone. I ended up downloading Instagram, and making a bogus account. Unbeknownst to me, it automatically sends an alert to my Facebook friends, and now they follow my extremely uncool account @stellabelladellafella, which has no posts as of yet.

Instagram feels like a new life project; it emanates a strong go hard or go home vibe, and I feel extremely pressured. As a sub-par photographer who only has two main albums on Facebook, entitled "Food-Related Stuff In Korea", and "Non-Food Related Stuff In Korea", I am utterly perplexed as to what else I can take photos of.

I shall mull over this.